Jungle Treckin' and Cyclone Wreckin'

We’ve been in Australia for a few weeks now. We’ve won’t lie, its had its ups (seeing quite a few long lost friends) and downs (the crap weather). For every chirpy “spring has sprung!” facebook post coming from the UK, we’ve been sat in yet another biblical downpour here. So this blog post comes with a weather warning – there will be a lot of complaining about the rain.

Sydney Harbour Bridge in characteristic heavy cloud

If we cast our minds back to 6^th March, we left our beloved New Zealand on a windy day, even by Wellington standards, so we suspected we might not be in for the smoothest of flights. Indeed we were not. The cabin crew attempted to run a drinks service once the plane has stopped climbing, but turbulence generally prevented this. Katie was quietly muttering her calming bumpy flight mantra: ‘Shruti would love this’ (our friend Shruti thinks turbulent flights are hilarious) and at one point Charlie commented ‘Mummy have we landed?’ to which Katie had to respond ‘No darling, it just felt like we did’. Eventually the captain demanded everyone sit down and belt up immediately and all the cabin crew marched grim-faced to the back of the plane and turned the entertainment system off. Katie has decided to book a space on a container ship for the journey home.

Our troubles were soon forgotten thanks to a friendly face waiting at Sydney airport – Katie’s old Greenpeace colleague Sarah. Sarah and her partner Egon, and her baby Alfie-Henry (they are yet to decide which!) were incredibly welcoming, put us up for two nights, cooked a delicious lasagna and gave us tickets for the fantastic Taronga Zoo, where Sarah works. 

The next day we decided to get out into Sydney and we visited the historic Rocks district and then took the boat over to Taronga. We headed straight for the spider-keeper’s talk to find out just what we were dealing with. We met the highly venomous funnel web and red back spiders and also checked out the non-dangerous but highly terrifying Huntsman. We’re not keen to run into any of these critters on our travels but we figured it would be good to know what they look like in case we do. It seems that unless you go rifling through some one’s wood pile you’re unlikely to meet them, but knowing this hasn’t helped us sleep much better all the same. 

A huntsman as big as the Harbor Bridge

That evening Ed and Katie had a rare night out (thanks to Sarah for babysitting) to see Nathaniel Rateliff and the Nightsweats play the Enmore Theatre in Newtown. We started the night at a very good yakitori place, followed by a brilliant concert. If you aren’t familiar check them out – think bluegrass, beards, trumpets and hand clapping. We defy you not to tap your foot.

The next day we headed off to the Blue Mountains to stay in a lovely house and look after Hudson the Cat while his owners were on holiday. The garden was teeming with pumpkins squashes, aubergines, courgettes… and spiders. We wanted that veg, but the arachnids stood between us and dinner. Ed gamely tucked his trousers into his socks and went out there brandishing a broom and a kitchen knife. These weapons were sufficient to harvest a few squashes and pumpkins which Ed expertly turned into pumpkin and coconut curry, pumpkin hummus, vegetable stew and squash and garlic soup. It was a delicious few days. A highlight of the Blue Mountains was seeing Angela, who took us to explore the Blue Mountains a bit further 

Not actually that blue

and we had a very enjoyable BBQ, followed by a hung-over and (rare) sunny Sunday on Bondi Beach. Bondi was quite unbelievable. We have never seen so many muscular and lithe bodies in one place. Luckily we fitted right in.

Banana Boy on Bondi Beach

The second week in the Blue Mountains was mostly spent with our sad little faces pressed up against rain-soaked windows, but Katie managed to get another night out to see her old school mate Sarika, who emigrated to Sydney some years ago. We went to ACME which does small plates of Asian inspired Italian cuisine (?!), some of which were really good. But the $16 teeny tiny baloney sandwiches made us laugh – however much you want to dress it up as nostalgic contemporary cuisine, it’s still a reconstituted ham sarnie people.

Ed took Charlie to a rather spectacular scenic park which included many vertiginous delights including a cable car precariously strung over a canyon,

Vertiginous

another climbing the side of a Blue Mountain and Charlie’s particular favourite, a funicular railway claiming to be the steepest in the world. It allowed you to adjust your seat hydraulically to choose how frightening your descent would be and it played the Indiana Jones theme as you set off. 

Der-de-de-der der-de-der...

Needless to say we rode this about 50 times right up until the park closed, even during the most torrential thunderstorm that hit half an hour before we left.

Our last day in Sydney was fun, we drove out over the Harbor Bridge (in torrential rain), went for a wet and blustery walk on Balmoral beach and brunched in the Bathers Pavilion café, an excellent recommendation from Seb. From there we headed back to The Zoo to say a quick “hi/bye’ to Sarah and check out a rather fantastic seal show. 
 

Sarah (quite appropriately) in climbing gear

Then we stopped in for dinner with another old colleague of Katie’s – Stephanie - and had a lovely evening catching up and spending time with her charming kids Finn and Megan… the latter of whom will probably be hitting a TV or cinema screen near you soon as she seems to forging an impressive acting portfolio for a seven year old. We stayed way later than we should have and then had to slog almost two hours home in yet another thunderstorm.

We left the house in the Blue Mountains to drive to Forster Tuncurry - a fairly unremarkable road trip in the pouring rain, passing through some impressive roads that sheered straight through massive rocks. We ate our picnic in a car park and dined on ready roast chicken and leftover vegetable stew in our little trailer cabin that night after swimming in the rain.

The drive from Forster Tuncurry to Yamba was another washout, we set off just as the rain began and decided to do a little detour to the recommended Boomerang beach and scenic drive back to the motorway. 

Really, another beach?

The beach was lovely but Ed spotted what appeared to be washed up jellyfish and decided to ditch the idea of getting in the water - we ain’t in NZ anymore and are acutely aware that the danger of death could be anywhere here! The scenic drive added two hours to our already long drive, most of which was peppered with torrential rain and a nagging worry that just round the next corner the road might be flooded under six foot of water as Katie was helpfully warned about by some friendly lady at a gas station. The highlight of the day was another detour to the upmarket town of Bellingen to visit the Hearthfire bakery, where we availed ourselves of the usual afternoon coffees accompanied by some superb chicken pie and assorted baked goods. Rejuvenated we drove up an impressive waterfall road and directly into a cloud which scuppered our plans to look out over an amazing jungle viewing platform. On our walk back to the car the attack of the leeches started as Ed felt a little bite on his middle toe and then realized a browny-green worm-like creature was on his foot. Trying to brush it off didn’t seem to budge it and when he bent down to flick it with his hand it switched from foot to finger and stuck like glue. He danced around shrieking for a bit and eventually managed to remove it with a little bleeding. Then Katie was also attacked as we got back to the car and we had a panicked 10-minute’s paranoia and squawking as we drove from the scene.

The next day we made a whistle stop visit to Byron Bay, principally to visit the Roadhouse Café, where we had one of the best meals of our trip. We shared a stunning slow roasted lamb lasagna and asparagus soup with goat’s cheese and olive oil, 

Asparagus soup partially covered by tattooed toddler arm, Katie looking smug with her choice

followed by a superlative toasted banana bread, made to a secret recipe. It shall become Katie’s life’s work to figure out how they made it (she has already made one delicious, but incorrect version). Later that day we arrived in Brisbane, (a city thank god!) 

the self-captioning photo

with the vast expanse of concrete making us feel at least superficially safe from the hoards of critters in the countryside. A lovely surprise was in store – a beautiful apartment belonging to friends of our mate Heather in Melbourne – who had gone on holiday and kindly let us stay in their absence. The flat was in a beautiful converted old wool warehouse. It had air con, double height ceilings and retro vintage furniture. We were in heaven.

We had a week in Brisbane and absolutely loved it. The main reason for going was to catch up with Ed’s good friend Dave and his family, which we did several times. The bonus was the city was a lovely place to visit, centered around a meandering river and a regular catamaran service from near our apartment. There were loads of free and interesting activities for both adults and children. First we discovered the Powerhouse, an old power station now converted to an art and theater space, which was running a kids music and jam. The powerful combination of toddler din and many lycra-clad mummies proved too much for Katie and she had to beat a hasty retreat but Charlie and Ed stuck it out. Afterwards we explored New Farm Park that had a rather impressive tree house playground.

Brisbane also sported a city beach and pools, a beautiful town hall where you could take a lift right up into the clock tower and a wealth of galleries and museums. Our favourite was GOMA – which had some great exhibitions including a room full of finches (yes real birds. Why not?) 

little terrors in the bird room

and a huge space for visitors to build stuff out of lego - only white bricks mind you – this is a modern art gallery. Ed built a giant tower and Katie a twee little house. Charlie and Olivia (Dave and Jackie’s eldest daughter) had a great time running around and became firm friends, he probably picked up a few naughty pointers such as when Olivia discarded her lunch wrap to be dissected by an ibis bird, or unplugging her seatbelt mid car ride or liberally distributing bean bag beans all over her room, all done with a cheeky grin! We also loved visiting the Science Fair, which featured real live turtles hatching out of their eggs and a table full of more spiders including a diving tarantula. It came as most unwelcome news to Katie that she’s not even safe from her nemesis in the water.

Sadly the day came that it was time to leave Brisbane and spend the next ten days heading up the coast towards Cairns. We had lots of fun things planned including three nights on Great Keppel Island in the southern Barrier Reef, a visit to the Whitsunday Islands and a snorkel trip to the reef itself. We started with the popular and quite swanky resort of Noosa and had the most awful day. We arrived on a busy sunny Sunday (some sun at last!) in the sweltering heat with nowhere booked to stay and nowhere to park. We finally made it to the beach populated by the requisite cast of Baywatch extras to sweat it out in the full sun with Charlie refusing to the go in the sea (he is very scared of waves, even small ones. Can’t think where he gets that from Katie?). This made us, quite unfairly, irrationally annoyed with him. We then went on an even more sweltering trek through the (admittedly beautiful) National Park during which Charlie fell over and grazed himself. We finally found some quite nice accommodation on the outskirts of town, only to be informed that a massive cyclone was due to hit Queensland and totally scupper all our plans. On the upside, the lady running the motel was a massive fan of the royals and Katie was able to thoroughly impress her by mentioning how she went to primary school with Kate M and Ed’s sister flew in an air ambulance with Prince William. “How wonderful to have such connected people stay with us!” she exclaimed. Indeed.

After going to bed at 8pm and getting some much-needed sleep, everyone was in a better mood the next day for a more successful morning in Noosa. We managed to not have a family row and instead ran up and down Sunshine Beach pretending to be horses (Katie’s favourite game as a child) 
 

Trotting

followed by a dip in the sea on the Main Beach (not Charlie though) and a delicious ice cream and iced coffee for Charlie and Ed respectively, the latter of which was the best example of its kind Ed had ever tasted, apparently. Katie smugly sipped a skinny latte, no doubt encouraged by all the bronzed beach bods. Then we continued up the coast on to Hervey Bay and stayed in a comfortable cabin in a nice holiday park with its own peacocks wandering around the place, awaiting further news of the cyclone and whether we would be able to get the boat to Great Keppel Island the next day as planned.

The next day, we learned that our ferry was cancelled due to the approaching cyclone and some quite enormous waves (quite a good reason, we thought) and so we decided to head to the nearby large town of Rockhampton thinking this would possess the necessary amenities should a crisis arise. We drove through an unbelievable rainstorm and arrived in a holiday park to rent a slightly overpriced cabin featuring two cockroaches lying supine, apparently having decided that death was better than putting up with this weather. However, it was raining too much to return to reception to complain. We made a foray out into Rockhampton which sits right on the tropic of Capricorn

Latitude straddling

which is the beef capital of Australia and is jam packed with life size sculptures of bulls, all with improbably large testicles (which are, according to an informative leaflet we read, anchored in steel to prevent any summary castrations). We popped into the legendary Botanical Gardens, which has its own free zoo. We walked in and the place was deserted. We spotted a couple of giant spider webs and then the mosquitos started massing, dive bombing us, clinging to any visible bit of skin. We’re not ashamed to say we ran out screaming and flailing and jumped back in the car, where it was safe. To add further insult to injury, the recommended steak restaurant was closed on Tuesdays. Rockhampton, it seems, had it in for us.

The next day we went to Great Keppel Island as the ferry was running. The crossing, they said, would be rough – but they’d had worse. What followed was quite simply the most terrifying boat trip Katie has ever been on. As soon as we left the harbor our boat (a small catamaran carrying about ten people and a lot of food and bedding for our holiday park) starting pitching about wildly, at first rearing up on a wave and then slamming down the other side, the vessel shuddering with the impact. Waves washed over the top of the boat. Ed spent most of the voyage in the outdoor area at the back and came back in just before the end looking like a Labrador that’s been swimming in a river – quite wet and rather too pleased with itself. He declared the 45-minute trip “exhilarating” and said he’d experienced much worse seas as a child on a yacht in Turkey. Katie gripped onto a seat muttering prayers to anyone who would listen. Charlie decided to follow Ed’s lead and said the boat trip was “amusing”. By the time we ran onto the beach at Great Keppel Island and disembarked, Katie and even Ed were feeling a bit nauseous, dropping to their knees and kissing the sand à la Kevin Costner in Robin Hood Prince of Thieves. 

Katie commented on a number of occasions that anyone considering sailing the round the world clipper race (you know who you are) would have to be clinically insane.

We got settled into our cabin and that night the tail end of Cyclone Debbie hit the island. All night the wind howled and shook our cabin and the sea whipped up enormous waves coming a bit too close for comfort. When we awoke the next morning there was about seven metres between us the cliff edge and part of the bar area of the holiday park had been washed into the sea. We spent the morning mostly hiding, but in the afternoon the sun came out and so we went for a walk/rock climb to the next bay where we found plenty of hermit crabs, broken off bits of coral and clams on a deserted beach. We were even treated to a pretty decent sunset. 

Just another sunset

We're happy to say that the weather improved after that and we even cautiously swam in the sea. The boat ride back to the mainland passed uneventfully and then we hightailed it up the coast past Cairns and the destruction wreaked by Cyclone Debbie was evident as we passed through coastal towns badly hit like Proserpine and Bowen. Last night we arrived in the jungle paradise of Port Douglas, right in the far north of the country. Sadly it turns out Charlie is too young to go on a proper Barrier Reef trip, so Ed has just left for a full day's snorkelling and Katie is going tomorrow. Today, Charlie and Katie are going to visit some crocs... wish us luck!